Actually, it’s by the mother of McSweeney’s List writer Pasha Malla, but it could just as well be my mother: the Internet: "Where people mess around with words." e-mail: "A way of communicating with people. You plug in and go for it." website: "Where you post information about a topic. Any topic. It could be anything. Therein lies the freedom." … Read More
Women’s Pro Golf
Up until today, women’s professional golf has ranked about No. 141 in my list of favorite sports, falling somewhere between tetherball and underwater hockey. But now I would place women’s professional golf at, oh, No. 54. This is why and this is why.
Evaluation Time
HillaryClinton.com: The Volokh Conspiracy (blog of prominent law school professors): CNN: Emily Mark’s blog: The New York Times political blog (The Caucus) The White House website: Massachusetts Institute of Technology’s Model-based Embedded and Robotic Systems Group (affiliated with the Computer Science and Artifical Intelligence Laboratory) website: This blog: Dammit!
My Year Of Being Sybil
What I have been in the past year: Jewish floor shop owner (Little Shop of Horrors) Army psychiatrist or possibly a hallucination (Bug) Oily nightclub owner (The Full Monty) Unemployed steelworker and bad stripper (The Full Monty) Irish priest (The Full Monty) Repo man (The Full Monty) Gay latino dance instructor (The Full Monty) Bespeckled messenger from God (God’s Favorite) … Read More
It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas….
…on Main Street in my hometown (Concord NH) Getting 6 to 12 inches between now and Tuesday. If only the darned tree would just stay up….
Christmas Idea For My Dog, Arrow
…who recently lost part of his ear… View other custom-made dog (and other animal) armor here.
Mamihlapinatapai
Wikipedia: Mamihlapinatapai (sometimes misspelled mamihlapinatapei) is a word from the Yaghan language of Tierra del Fuego, listed in The Guinness Book of World Records as the "most succinct word", and is considered one of the hardest words to translate. It describes a look shared by two people with each wishing that the other will initiate something that both desire but … Read More
Domestic Dog Violence
Bo, the big one, apparently decided he had had enough of the little one’s antics. Arrow is now missing 1/3rd of his right ear. He is bandaged for a couple of days, and has to wear a lampshade until Wednesday. Arrow doesn’t mind the missing ear part. He minds that bandage a little. But he really HATES the lampshade. He … Read More
An Open Letter To Matthew Johnson, Managing Editor Of Madison’s Who’s Who
Dear , I start off my open letter with "Dear ," for one reason: because that’s how you addressed me in your latest email, in which you notified me that I was "recently appointed as a biographical candidate" to represent my "industry" in Madison’s ("Not-To-Be-Confused-With-Marquis’s") Who’s Who Among Executives and Professionals, and to let me know that you … Read More
$78,100
That’s how much it would cost to buy the 12 gifts mentioned in The 12 Days of Christmas. I’m willing to bet much of that is due to the five golden rings which, when you think about it, is unnecesssarily extravagent. By the way, that’s up 4% from last year.
Light Blogging For A Few Days
Okay, well. It’s the day before Thanksgiving and everyone is gearing up to go to Grandma’s house, or to get up at zero o’clock so you can drag giant Shrek balloons down Manhattan, or to do things that will stay in Vegas, or to spend a few days of much needed down time before tech week (that’s me), or to … Read More
If I Had The Time And Inclination To Waste My Life….
…I just might spend it doing this. Pictured above is (obviously) an island. But what is unique about it is this: it is a do-it-yourself portable island. It was built by one guy, and it rests on top of 250,000 empty plastic bottles, which cause it to float. The bottles were combined in nets, then plywood and bamboo was lay … Read More
In Which I Address Paul McCartney’s Ex-Wife
Heather Mills has a question: "There are many other kinds of milk available. Why don’t we try drinking rats’ milk and dogs’ milk?" My answer: Because that’s disgusting?!?
The Cat With Two Faces And Three Eyes
Sorry. Probably should have posted this on Halloween. Read about the miracle cat here.