Actually, it’s by the mother of McSweeney’s List writer Pasha Malla, but it could just as well be my mother:
the Internet: "Where people mess around with words."
e-mail: "A way of communicating with people. You plug in and go for it."
website: "Where you post information about a topic. Any topic. It could be anything. Therein lies the freedom."
firewall: "It must block something. On the computer. It’s something you can’t get beyond, no matter how hard you try."
Adobe Acrobat: "You made that one up."
virus: "You have anti-virus protection on your computer. It protects against bogey people—like, bogey-bogey. It’s really important. This scares me."
Firefox: "Definitely something to do with firewalls."
RAM: "The capacity of a computer … program. I think. Why don’t you just tell me? You’re mean."