Jokes Made By Robots, For Robots

Ken AshfordRandom MusingsLeave a Comment

McSweeney’s Lists: A rabbi, an Arab, a robot, and a Catholic priest walk into a bar. Only the robot exits. A robot walks into a pharmacy. The pharmacist asks him if he’d like anything. The robot replies, "A soul." How do you stop a robot from destroying you and the rest of civilization?You don’t. "Waiter! Waiter! What’s this robot doing … Read More

News Stories I Like To Read

Ken AshfordRandom MusingsLeave a Comment

Americans: 60’s are the new middle age Story Highlights • 60 percent of Americans surveyed believe their 60’s are the new middle age• Globally, three out of five consumers surveyed believed the 40’s are the new 30’s

Godfather Sold Separately

Ken AshfordRandom MusingsLeave a Comment

Love this warning which appears at this website, which is selling a FurReal Friends Butterscotch Pony (pictured right).  The product carries the following warning: Adults take note: Pony comes unassembled in box with head detatched. You may wish to not open the box around your children if they may be frightened by a box with a decapitated horse inside. Noted.

The Top 100 TV Catch Phrases Of All Time

Ken AshfordPopular CultureLeave a Comment

As compiled by TV Land, in alphabeticial order: "Aaay" (Fonzie, "Happy Days") "And that’s the way it is" (Walter Cronkite, "CBS Evening News") "Ask not what your country can do for you …" (John F. Kennedy) "Baby, you’re the greatest" (Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden, "The Honeymooners") "Bam!" (Emeril Lagasse, "Emeril Live") "Book ’em, Danno" (Steve McGarrett, "Hawaii Five-O") "Come … Read More

The Bush Presidential Library

Ken AshfordBush & Co.Leave a Comment

The Bush Presidential Library?  The jokes write themselves.  But Arianna Huffington does a good job writing them too: Comedy writers and lovers of the absurd all across America have a bounce in their step today, buoyed by news that President Bush is looking to raise half-a-billion dollars to build his legacy-burnishing presidential library. The idea of Uncurious George building a … Read More

Confirmed, Part II

Ken AshfordWomen's IssuesLeave a Comment

No duh: It is something one half of the population has long suspected – and the other half always vocally denied. Women really do talk more than men. In fact, women talk almost three times as much as men, with the average woman chalking up 20,000 words in a day – 13,000 more than the average man. Women also speak … Read More

Confirmed

Ken AshfordBush & Co.Leave a Comment

I present without comment: Lohse, a social work master’s student at Southern Connecticut State University, says he has proven what many progressives have probably suspected for years: a direct link between mental illness and support for President Bush. Lohse says his study is no joke. The thesis draws on a survey of 69 psychiatric outpatients in three Connecticut locations during … Read More

From The Mind Of Barbara Stock

Ken AshfordRight Wing Punditry/IdiocyLeave a Comment

We haven’t checked in with conservative columnnist Barbara Stock in a while, so we decided to.  It’s nice to know that she’s still wetting her bloomers over olive-skinned people: On their way back from a three-day meeting in Minneapolis of the North American Imams Federation, six Islamic imams were stunned to find out that suspicious behavior by Muslims on large … Read More

Light Blogging?

Ken AshfordBloggingLeave a Comment

Well, I’ve exceeded my bandwidth for the month.  Or, more accurately, you’ve exceeded my bandwidth. Not quite sure why, but I’m inching up to 50,000 "hits" to my main page, and I’m averaging over 150 per day — so I’m pretty sure it’s not just me.  Anyway, I’m only alotted a certain amount of transfer bandwidth per month here at … Read More

A God Debate

Ken AshfordGodstuffLeave a Comment

It’s too long to republish here, but this email debate between atheist Sam Harris and evangelical Dennis Prager is an interesting (if not demanding) read.  The topic is the Existence of A Judeo-Christian God (or lack thereof). It’s hard to be objective, but the flaws in Prager’s arguments stand out.  Prager first does the strawman bit, telling Harris what atheists … Read More

Oy

Ken AshfordGodstuffLeave a Comment

From Denver: DENVER — A homeowners association in southwestern Colorado has threatened to fine a resident $25 a day until she removes a Christmas wreath with a peace sign that some say is an anti-Iraq war protest or a symbol of Satan. Some residents who have complained have children serving in Iraq, said Bob Kearns, president of the Loma Linda … Read More