Seriously, it's this:

That's right.  Barack Hussein Nobama made a Marine violate miltary code by forcing him to hold an umbrella.

That's the scandal du jour.

And indeed, military code says that a soldier in dress uniform should not carry an umbrella.

But military code experts say something like this:

“IF THE COMMANDER IN CHIEF GIVES YOU A LAWFUL ORDER YOU FOLLOW THE MOTHERFUCKING LAWFUL ORDER. IF THE COMMANDER IN CHIEF WANTS AN UMBRELLA YOU BETTER BELIEVE A WHOLE FUCKING GRIP OF JARHEARDS ARE GONNA BE HIGH-STEPPING TO BRING HIM A MOTHERFUCKING UMBRELLA!”