Dear Abby Hijacked: Volume Five

Ken AshfordDear Abby HijackedLeave a Comment

Because it's Friday and I'm bored….

Past installments

From her October 30 column:

DEAR ABBY: My friend, "Steven," and I have known each other 10 years. He and I have seen each other through many good times, and a few bad ones.

Most recently, Steven was in a relationship with a woman who couldn't stand the thought of his having female friends. So, for the last 18 months, the only contact I have had with him was via e-mail — and that was very seldom.

Steven recently e-mailed me saying he had broken up with this insecure woman. He expressed how sorry he was for the limited contact, and said he would like for us to rebuild our friendship. I'm thrilled to finally have my friend back, but I also feel somewhat resentful toward him for his having discarded me.

Abby, I missed Steven. But how can I be his pal again when I am still hurt by his blatant disregard for our friendship and my feelings over the past year and a half? — UNCERTAIN IN LONG BEACH

 Dear Uncertain:

Well, you don't have to be his pal, but that's cutting off your nose in spite of your face.

Look, just tell him how you feel/felt about being "disregarded".   He's already apologized, so he seems aware of it.  But if you think there's more to be said, then say it.   I don't suspect this Steven will have changed much during his hiatus from your friendship, and he will understand.

Best of luck,

Dear Abby Hijacked


Beach cast DEAR ABBY: For the last seven months I have been planning a Florida vacation with two of my girlfriends. However, one of them, "Heather," has just announced that she will be having foot surgery before we leave. She will be in a cast and able to walk only with the use of crutches. I hoped that Heather would cancel, but she's still planning to come anyway.

Abby, I don't want to take care of her on my only vacation. Am I being selfish? Should we let her come and just sit in the condo while we go out to explore? I'm afraid our friendship will suffer. What should I do? — VACATION-BOUND IN THE NORTHWEST

Dear V-BitNW:

Do you even know that she expects  you to "take care of her"?  How about talking to her? 

And in the course of that conversation, you can suggest that you don't want her to feel bad when you and your other travel companion hit the clubs or do things that can't involve the crip.

I mean, maybe Heather just wants to lie on the beach all day, you know?

So talk to her.

Have a nice vacation,

Dear Abby Hijacked