Improv Everywhere Strikes Again

Ken AshfordPopular CultureLeave a Comment

The date:  August 19, 2006 The target:  Home Depot’s mega-store in Manhatten The mission:  225 participants (or "agents") entered the Home Depot posing as ordinary customers, scattered throughout the store and then proceeded to shop . . . in slow motion.  At a pre-determined time, they all froze for five minutes. The results:  Full recounting, with video and photos, here.  … Read More

Red Sox Showing Signs Of Life

Ken AshfordRed Sox & Other SportsLeave a Comment

Yay: Josh Beckett rebounded from one of the worst outings of his career to pitch six strong innings, David Ortiz hit his 46th homer, and the Boston Red Soxbeat the Los Angeles Angels 2-1 Thursday night to hand rookie Jered Weaver his first loss. Ooops.  Did I say "signs of life"?  Maybe not: Ortiz confirmed an Internet report that he … Read More

Barney & “Friends”

Ken AshfordSex/Morality/Family ValuesLeave a Comment

An actual Letter-To-The Editor from The Villiage News (of Fallbrook, CA): On Tuesday, August 8, I took my family out to Daniel’s for groceries. I have a 6-year-old daughter who learned how to read from the Barney and Friends book series. As we stepped out of the family van, she was very excited to see a Barney movie being advertised … Read More

Miss Bin Laden If You’re Nasty

Ken AshfordPopular CultureLeave a Comment

Much snickering lately about the new book by Kola Boof, a woman who claims to have been bin Laden’s sex slave for several years.  She claims, among other things, that Osama was obsessed with Whitney Houston, loved the B-52’s and was more or less fixated on women’s rears. Now comes word that the book already has "movie deal" on it, … Read More

Didn’t We Resolve This, Like, 50 Years Ago?

Ken AshfordRaceLeave a Comment

Oy: COUSHATTA — Nine black children attending Red River Elementary School were directed last week to the back of the school bus by a white driver who designated the front seats for white children. The situation has outraged relatives of the black children who have filed a complaint with school officials.

Necessity Is The Mother Of Silly Inventions

Ken AshfordScience & TechnologyLeave a Comment

Take a gander at some of the stupid inventions that people have come with over at the Delphion Gallery Of Obscure Patents.  Here’s some of my favorite patents actually filed with the U.S. Patent Office: US05356330Apparatus for simulating a ‘high five’ …providing the user with a convenient outlet for the release of excitement. US05971829Motorized ice cream cone …for imparting rotation … Read More

Jesus Loves Mrs. Turner’s Baby More Than Yours

Ken AshfordGodstuffLeave a Comment

We’ve delighted in the appearances of Jeebus and the Blessed Virgin Mary in pasta dishes, burnt toast, tree trunks, water stains, drywall, grilled chess sandwiches, potato chips, and dripped chocolate. Now, He’s showing up . . . in a womb.  Here’s the ultrasound of Laura Turner of Warwickshire, England: Now, with all due respect to Mrs. Turner, it’s great that … Read More

Rove Misleads The American Public

Ken AshfordWar on Terrorism/TortureLeave a Comment

This is the kind of thing that drives me batshit crazy: TOLEDO, Ohio — Presidential adviser Karl Rove criticized a federal judge’s order for an immediate end to the government’s warrantless surveillance program, saying Wednesday such a program might have prevented the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks. Rove said the government should be free to listen if al-Qaida is calling someone … Read More

Christian Coalition Is Disintegrating

Ken AshfordGodstuffLeave a Comment

About time, too: Aug 23, 2006 (AP)— Three disgruntled state affiliates have severed ties with the Christian Coalition of America, one of the nation’s most powerful conservative groups during the 1990s but now buffeted by complaints over finances, leadership and its plans to veer into nontraditional policy areas. *** The coalition, which claims more than 2 million members, was founded … Read More

It’s Official – Pluto Not A Planet

Ken AshfordScience & TechnologyLeave a Comment

There are literally millions of objects orbiting the sun, but some of them are as tiny as your hand.  And some of them, while quite large (i.e., the surface area of the United States, say), are not spherical.  Are those technically "planets"? You may have heard about the gathering of world’s astronomers in Prague.  Their mission: to define what a … Read More