Marie Jon’s Romance Tips

Ken AshfordRight Wing Punditry/Idiocy, Sex/Morality/Family Values1 Comment

Mariejon0504Social conservative Marie Jon over at Renew America pens some advice for women:

Forty years of feminist philosophy has brought severe reproof for just about everything the male does. If we listen to the feminists, man is evil, stupid, and unjustly tyrannical.

When the truth is that women are evil.  To make this point, Marie links to an article entitled "Feminist Movement Betty Friedan Led Has Its Roots In The Occult, Necromancy, Demonic Spiritualism."

The feminist movement, which began in the early 60’s, has played a decisive role in denigrating the family. However, the main cause of family problems today is our self-centeredness.

Shorter Marie Jon: Feminism — with all its occult, necromancy and demonism — is terrible, but not as terrible as you, you selfish bitch.

God gives women affectionate power. Men are born out of a women’s womb. They spend their lives yearning for a woman’s acceptance and approval.

Right.  Being birthed from the vaginal canal of a woman made us guys feel rejected.

Man is putty in the hands of the woman he loves.

Use this to your advantage, girls!

Give him direct communication, respect, appreciation, good food, and good loving’ and he will do just about anything you wish, foolish or not.

Love’ that good loving’.

God made women verbal creatures, which can frustrate men with an overwhelming amount of talk. Instead of expecting her husband to be "a girlfriend," the wise wife should choose the proper topic and timing of discussions.

And leave incoherent rambling to her online columns at Renew America.

Take whatever he says at face value.

Because men always have a good bead on their feelings, and express themselves well.

Women tend to overanalyze men. They are not that complicated.

Well, that’s true.  We’re putty, remember?

Women need love just as they needs air to breathe.

Read that sentence in a Popeye voice.  It’s even funnier.

[Ephesians 5:31] commands a wife to respect her husband. Why? He needs respect as he needs air to breathe.

So both men and women need(s) air to breathe.  Thanks for the tip.

Men long for their wives attention, affection, and affirmation.

I think Marie Jon’s apostrophe ran away from this sentence, and set up shop next to "good loving" above.

Respect involves paying attention to what they do.

Spy on them.  Read their emails.  That kind of stuff.

Men and women have a different language of love. Every man and woman wants to be appreciated for who they are and what they do. Keep an "Appreciation Journal" to help remind yourself of the things your mate does that you appreciate.

Because otherwise, you’ll forget.  You’ll forget because you’re a ditzy selfish woman with no recall ability.

Thank each other for being faithful.

You know, if my wife came out of the blue and thanked me for being faithful, my suspicion meter would go through the roof.

Love your spouse with kindness and respect, and receive all the fantastic perks.

You see, love works on a barter system, girls.  Pure economics.

When love, respect and appreciation are openly expressed, a happy home is it’s own rewards.

Also — when love, respect and appreciation are openly expressed, grammar and punctuation just don’t seem to matter anymore.  In fact, proper grammar and punctuation probably have their roots in 1960’s feminism.

The American family needs to return to godly principals.

Because we have too many ungodly principals, like that awful Mr. Skinner on "The Simpsons".