On the heels of the no-duh-inducing scientific study that men are attracted to good-looking women comes another scientific study from the realms of the glaringly obvious: two year olds have better social learning skills than apes.
Is there any doubt that this is true? I mean, two year olds eventually learn to behave and be more socially skilled. Apes, not so much. Therefore, it’s rather obvious that 2 year olds have better social learning skills than apes. We don’t need a scientific study to prove this.
Another recent no-brainer study finds that (shock!) women place a greater emphasis on kissing than men.
And another obvious scientific study inform us what we already know to be true: Rock stars are more likely to die young than non-rocker stars.
Guess what else we’ve learn from recent scientific studies:
- Combining Drugs and Alcohol is Bad For You
- Gun-Toting Drivers are More Prone to Road Rage
- Too Many Meetings Make You Grumpy
- Faraway Objects Are Tougher to See
- Swallowing More Than One Magnet is Dangerous
- Smoking Cigarettes Costs You Money
- Memory and Concentration Fade With Age
- Women Like Funny Men
What’s going on here? Have scientists run out of things to study?
Hey, you lab-coat-wearing, bespeckled, nerds! I want my flying car! A cure for the common cold! A holodeck! Get crackin’!