Ann Coulter: The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Ken AshfordBush & Co., Iraq, Right Wing Punditry/Idiocy, SheehanLeave a Comment

I love her:

To expiate the pain of losing her firstborn son in the Iraq war, Cindy Sheehan decided to cheer herself up by engaging in Stalinist agitprop outside President Bush’s Crawford ranch.

I don’t think she went to Crawford to "cheer herself up".  But note that we’re only one sentence in, and we have more amature psychology from the smear merchants.

It’s the strangest method of grieving I’ve seen since Paul Wellstone’s funeral. Someone needs to teach these liberals how to mourn.

There’s only one way to do things in the land of the free, you see.  Ann’s way.

Call me old-fashioned,

Oh, I can think of many things to call you, Ann, but "old-fashioned" isn’t one of them.

but a grief-stricken war mother shouldn’t have her own full-time PR flack. After your third profile on "Entertainment Tonight," you’re no longer a grieving mom; you’re a C-list celebrity trolling for a book deal or a reality show.

Interestingly, on Ann’s website (as it is now), this sentence appears about four inches below an advertisement for Ann’s new book.  Troll.

We’re sorry about Ms. Sheehan’s son, but the entire nation was attacked on 9/11. This isn’t about her personal loss.

Well, you see, Ann, it is about personal loss, for Sheehan.

America has been under relentless attack from Islamic terrorists for 20 years, culminating in a devastating attack on U.S. soil on 9/11. It’s not going to stop unless we fight back, annihilate Muslim fanatics, destroy their bases, eliminate their sponsors and end all their hope. A lot more mothers will be grieving if our military policy is: No one gets hurt!

Fortunately, the Constitution vests authority to make foreign policy with the president of the United States, not with this week’s sad story.

Damn.  And I so wanted Bush to appoint Sheehan as Secretary of State.

But liberals think…

When you see the phrase "lilberals think" coming from a conservative, you know that the next words are going to be pure gold.

…that since they have been able to produce a grieving mother, the commander in chief should step aside and let Cindy Sheehan make foreign policy for the nation.

Bingo!

As Maureen Dowd said, it’s "inhumane" for Bush not "to understand that the moral authority of parents who bury children killed in Iraq is absolute."

I’m not sure what "moral authority" is supposed to mean in that sentence,…

Ann Coulter, who advocated bombing the New York Times building, struggles with moral authority in general.

…but if it has anything to do with Cindy Sheehan dictating America’s foreign policy, then no, it is not "absolute." It’s not even conditional, provisional, fleeting, theoretical or ephemeral.

I’m not quite sure why Ann thinks that Cindy Sheehan is applying for a job with the Bush Administration, but I wish she would get off it.

The logical, intellectual and ethical shortcomings of such a statement are staggering. If one dead son means no one can win an argument with you, how about two dead sons? What if the person arguing with you is a mother who also lost a son in Iraq and she’s pro-war? Do we decide the winner with a coin toss? Or do we see if there’s a woman out there who lost two children in Iraq and see what she thinks about the war?

Mmmmm.  Who was it who just tried to out-grieve Cindy Sheehan by pointing out that thousands died on 9/11?

Dowd’s "absolute" moral authority column demonstrates, once again, what can happen when liberals start tossing around terms they don’t understand like "absolute" and "moral."

Mmmmm.  Who was it who just said she doesn’t understand what "moral authority" means when used in a sentence?

It seems that the inspiration for Dowd’s column was also absolute. On the rocks.

Get it?  Because Dowd is a drunk!  What a card!!  Ann should do the Catskill circuit.

Liberals demand that we listen with rapt attention to Sheehan…

And those liberals are…?

…but she has nothing new to say about the war. At least nothing we haven’t heard from Michael Moore since approximately 11 a.m., Sept. 11, 2001. It’s a neocon war; we’re fighting for Israel; it’s a war for oil; Bush lied, kids died; there is no connection between Saddam Hussein and al-Qaida. Turn on MSNBC’s "Hardball" and you can hear it right now. At this point, Cindy Sheehan is like a touring company of Air America radio: Same old script and it’s not even the original cast.

Yes.  It’s the same argument.  Unlike the neo-cons who keep shifting the reasons why we invaded Iraq in the first place.

These arguments didn’t persuade Hillary Clinton or John McCain to vote against the war. They didn’t persuade Democratic primary voters, who unceremoniously dumped anti-war candidate Howard Dean in favor of John Kerry, who voted for the war before he voted against it. They certainly didn’t persuade a majority of American voters who re-upped George Bush’s tenure as the nation’s commander in chief last November.

But they have persuaded a majority of Americans, who now believe we wrong to get into Iraq.

So Ann’s point, I guess, is that if people were fooled once, they should shut up and continue to be fooled.

But now liberals demand that we listen to the same old arguments all over again

I don’t make any demands at all.  In fact, I’m willing to bet that Coulter of her own volition has probably heard and read more about Sheehan than I have.

…not because Sheehan has any new insights, but because she has the ability to repel dissent by citing her grief.

Well, she doesn’t have that ability.  Witness your own column.

On the bright side, Sheehan shows us what Democrats would say if they thought they were immunized from disagreement. Sheehan has called President Bush "that filth-spewer and warmonger." She says "America has been killing people on this continent since it was started" and "the killing has gone on unabated for over 200 years." She calls the U.S. government a "morally repugnant system" and says, "This country is not worth dying for." I have a feeling every time this gal opens her trap, Michael Moore gets a residuals check.

Hahahaha!  Becauase Michael Moore is a liberal, too!  Get it?

No, neither do I.  Someone call Coulter’s agent and cancel that Catskills thing.

Evidently, however, there are some things worth killing for. Sheehan recently said she only seemed calm "because if I started hitting something, I wouldn’t stop ’til it was dead." It’s a wonder Bush won’t meet with her.

Yeah, it would be an embarrassment if a rough-and-ready brush-clearing Texan got beaten up by a frail, emtionally-weary woman. 

Of course, hiding from her because he’s afraid of getting the crap beat out of him is much more of an embarrassment.  Kinda like the way he handled service in Vietnam, I suppose.